Suffering Is The Key to Love
If you allow it, your pain and discomforts have the ability to unlock the door to the deepest love
My eyes are closed and I am in meditation posture. Lotus position on the floor of my bedroom, sitting on my cushion bringing gently my awareness to my breath, then my body, then my surroundings. I’ve done this a thousand times before. But today was different. Today I could feel deep inside my belly this feeling of sadness. And for the first time, instead of pushing it away whilst meditating, I curiously poked at it with my consciousness. Like a child discovering an earthworm, I wanted to see what it was made of.
The sadness started to bubble, it rose up the front of my body into my chest. I gasped, audibly, physically. This was unusual for me, as I liked to sit perfectly still in posture, without moving to prove my subconscious “strength”. But my intentions had recently changed — I was no longer meditating to count the hours or days I could sit still. I was meditating to feel deeply into my humanness. To observe and discover the things that my body and mind was holding onto that had been too long shoved under the rug. Suddenly, it happened. Like the gentle release of a pressure cooker, my body started shaking. Tears rolled down my face as I allowed myself to be enveloped by sobs and the kind of wailing that…
